You can't go to the beach for July 4th in Miami-Dade but lap dances from a stripper are still allowed
http://twitchy.com/gregp-3534/2020/06/30/you-cant-go-to-the-beach-for-july-4th-in-miami-dade-but-lap-dances-from-a-stripper-are-still-allowed/
SHOT ...
Because of COVID-19, beaches in Miami-Dade County will be closed for the 4th of July weekend:
Fox 17 ~ Miami-Dade County, Florida, will close all of its beaches from July 3 through July 7 amid an outbreak of COVID-19 in the Sunshine State, Mayor Carlos A. Gimenez announced on Friday.
CHASER ...
But you can still get a lap dance at a strip club:
Andy Slater ~ UPDATE: Miami-Dade says lap dances are not considered performances.
So, as of now, lap dances may continue at strip clubs in the county.
For real. Confirmed via an email with Deputy Mayor Jennifer Moon:
Doug Hanks ~ Deep breath, Twitter. Lap dances NOT actually banned in Miami-Dade by new COVID rules. The 10-ft required buffer for performances reported today isn't new & doesn't govern lap dances. My email w Dpty Mayor Jennifer Moon, charged w COVID rule making. She said lap dances still OK.
If you want people to stop taking everything the government says on corona seriously, well then, this is a pretty good place to start.
The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted. ~ D.H. Lawrence