We are five days away from Christmas and, as I’ve reported, we have much to celebrate. It’s time for a much-earned Christmas cocktail. But not just any cocktail — let’s have something patriotic.
I created these drinks with what I have in my bar. I should warn you, my apartment, the Atomic Bunker, has 18 “pandemic” months’ worth of clown juice lying around. I might have things you don’t. Also, I might have developed a drinking problem penchant.
Here are nine Christmas libations for conservatives to enjoy. Make sure your unemployed Antifa nephew finishes hers before you tell zhim what it just drank.
Orange Man Bad
My favorite. Easy to make and delicious, even to those who don’t haven’t yet learned to enjoy bourbon. P.S. Bourbon is an American spirit, so this cocktail is dee-lish and patriotic.
• 2 oz. of your favorite bourbon • 1/2 oz. triple sec • 1-2 dashes orange bitters • strip of orange peel • Death-star-sized ice cube
Triple Sec and bourbon? Yes. Make one drink in a glass or use a cocktail shaker to make enough for a “mostly peaceful” evening in Boston with your liberal sister-in-law.
IMPORTANT: After your drink is made, take a strip of orange peel, squeeze it thoroughly, light it on fire and toss it into the cocktail glass.
MORE IMPORTANT: Don’t burn your fingers.
MAGA-Rita
This is especially good for those Americans celebrating Christmas near our dangerous southern border. It requires using tequila that has entered the U.S. legally.
• 3 oz. jalapeno-flavored Tanteo tequila • 2 oz. of triple sec • lime juice to taste (go heavy, trust me) • crushed ice
The jalapeno taste in this tequila is profound. One might call it a “wall” of flavor. I recommend going a little heavy on the lime juice, say, two ounces. The aroma of the tequila might summon a few Border Patrol Agents if Biden hasn’t fired them all over the stupid vaccine mandate.
Green New Deal
• sour apple schnapps
You know better. Disregard this. Drink like an adult.
Let’s Go Brandon!
For the Let’s Go Brandon cocktail, you’ll need Lime gin (Let’s) Go (gin, orange) Brandon (bitters, also orange). Tanqueray makes a dandy orange gin that I love and a lime-flavored gin that I adore. Fever-Tree tonic is the best out there. This cocktail is a fancy gin and tonic.
• 1.5 oz. orange gin • 1.5 oz. lime gin • dash of orange bitters • 1 oz. lime juice • Fever Tree Indian tonic
Combine the first four ingredients in a cocktail shaker with ice. Shake vigorously, as though you have your hands around Pelosi’s shoulders. Pour into a glass, fill remainder with tonic. If there are no kids at your Christmas bash, this drink is also called the FJB.
Build Back Better
Thanks to Sen. Joe Manchin, this cocktail is unavailable.
2nd Amendment
This is a glass of Bulleit bourbon, with chilled cocktail bullets to keep it cool. Again, bourbon is an AMERICAN spirit. ‘Nuff said.
The BLM
The BLM is a mostly peaceful drink. So they say. It’s also our only drink served on fire.
• 3 oz. gin • grapefruit juice • float 151 rum on top, light on fire
In order to enjoy this drink, douse the flame. Unless you’re serving it to a lib, in which case they’ll pretend it isn’t burning.
Pro tip: I set this on fire with an American-made Zippo lighter engraved with “F*** Communism.” No, I’m not kidding. See the pic of the 2nd Amendment cocktail.
The Rittenhouse
The Rittenhouse is three shots of Absolute Raspberry, (get it, AR). This is the only bottle I don’t currently have. We opened it, and finished it, the day Rittenhouse was found not guilty of murder after he ventilated three Antifa creatures in self-defense.
Antifa Punch
Let’s face it, if you want to punch someone, it’s probably Antifa. This one is juicy. And much like Antifa, it’s a bit girly.
• light rum • dark rum • coconut rum • cheap vodka • pineapple juice • orange juice • lime juice
Serve in a scorpion bowl (because they don’t make a pansy bowl). Preferable to serve in a place without a strong 2nd Amendment presence. You may have noticed Antifa pulls their nonsense in places that don’t have a lot of gun folks, except for that night in Kenosha…
There you have it, folks. Christmas is upon us and things are looking bright. Merry Christmas. Yes, I said it: MERRY CHRISTMAS! Have a patriotic drink on me. If you have similar recipes, please leave them in the comments.
DON'T BELIEVE A DAMN WORD YOU READ ON THIS WEBSITE!
The reader is responsible for discerning the validity, factuality or implications of information posted here, be it fictional or based on real events. Moderators on this forum make every effort to review the material posted on this site however, it is not realistically possible for a one man team to manually review each and every one of the posts atomicbobs.com gets on a daily basis.
The content of posts on this site, including but not limited to links to other web sites, are the expressed opinion of the original poster and are in no way representative of or endorsed by the owners or administration of this website. The posts on this website are the opinion of the specific author and are not statements of advice, opinion, or factual information on behalf of the owner or administration of Atomicbob’s. This site may contain adult language, if you feel you might be offended by such content, you should log off immediately.
Not all posts on this website are intended as truthful or factual assertion by their authors. Some users of this website are participating in internet role playing, with or without the use of an avatar. NO post on this website should be considered factual information on face value alone. Users are encouraged to
USE DISCERNMENT
and do their own follow up research while reading and posting on this website. Atomicbobs.com reserves the right to make changes to, corrections and/or remove entirely at any time posts made on this website without notice. In addition, Atomicbobs.com disclaims any and all liability for damages incurred directly or indirectly as a result of a post on this website.
This website implements certain security features in order to prevent spam and posting abuse. By making a post on this website you consent to any automated security checks required by our system to authenticate your IP address as belonging to an actual human. It is forbidden to make posts on this website from open proxy servers. By making a post on this website you consent to an automated one time limited port scan of your IP address which is required by our security system to validate the authenticity of your internet connection.
This site is provided "as is" without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. You should not assume that this site is error-free or that it will be suitable for the particular purpose which you have in mind when using it. In no event shall Atomicbobs.com be liable for any special, incidental, indirect or consequential damages of any kind, or any damages whatsoever, including, without limitation, those resulting from loss of use, data or profits, whether or not advised of the possibility of damage, and on any theory of liability, arising out of or in connection with the use or performance of this site or other documents which are referenced by or linked to this site.
Some events depicted in certain posting and threads on this website may be fictitious and any similarity to any person living or dead is merely coincidental. Some other articles may be based on actual events but which in certain cases incidents, characters and timelines have been changed for dramatic purposes. Certain characters may be composites, or entirely fictitious.
We do not discriminate against the mentally ill!
Fair Use Notice:
This site may contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. Users may make such material available in an effort to advance awareness and understanding of issues relating to civil rights, economics, individual rights, international affairs, liberty, science & technology, etc. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law.
At some point freedom of speech and copyright law merge. The following interpretation of "Fair Use" and subsequent posting policy were developed with the assistance of qualified legal council however, we are not lawyers and cannot offer you legal advise as to the limits of "Fair Use"
In accordance with industry accepted best practices we ask that users limit their copy / paste of copyrighted material to the relevant portions of the article you wish to discuss and no more than 50% of the source material, provide a link back to the original article and provide your original comments / criticism in your post with the article.
Though legally each situation is evaluated independently according to guidelines that were intentionally left open to interpretation, we believe generally this policy represents "Fair Use" of any such copyrighted material for the purposes of education and discussion.
You are responsible for what you "publish" on the internet. You must be sure any copyrighted material you choose to post for discussion on this forum falls within the limits of "Fair Use" as defined by the law.
If you are a legal copyright holder or a designated agent for such and you believe a post on this website falls outside the boundaries of "Fair Use" and legitimately infringes on yours or your clients copyright
we may be contacted concerning copyright matters at:
If you require a courier address please send a fax or email and we will provide you with the required information.
For expedited human review & removal of potential copyright violations we encourage users & copyright holders to utilize the "Report Copyright Violation" button that accompanies each post published on this website.
In accordance with section 512 of the U.S. Copyright Act our contact information has been registered with the United States Copyright Office. "Safe Harbor" noticing procedures as outlined in the DMCA apply to this website concerning all 3rd party posts published herein.
If notice is given of an alleged copyright violation we will act expeditiously to remove or disable access to the material(s) in question. It is our strict policy to disable access to accounts of repeat copyright violators. We will also ban the IP address of repeat offenders from future posting on this website with or without a registered account.
All 3rd party material posted on this website is copyright the respective owners / authors. Atomicbobs.com makes no claim of copyright on such material.
Please be aware any communications sent complaining about a post on this website may be posted publicly at the discretion of the administration.
---
DON'T BREAK THE LAW!
---
Other than that you can do / say whatever you want on this forum.
We reserve the right to block access to this website by any individual or organization at any time for any reason whatsoever or no reason at all.
| 
