Now, now, micro ... don't go throwin' rocks in yer glass house, there, brother! Heh heh heh heh heh.
Indiana? Meh. Okay ... fine ... Indiana isn't a total patsy for a season opener, but it certainly isn't anywhere near the toughest of conference competition.
Then ... for the second game ... you bestow sainthood upon Ohio State for "altruistically" playing the Youngstown Penguins ... WHO???!!! ... because Ohio State simply wants to provide financial benefits to poor lil' Youngstown. Puhleeeeeeeeeeeease! BWHA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
But finally, you throw in a dig about the SEC only playing "cupcakes" early on. Really?
Ahem ...
Week 1 - Florida vs. Utah; LSU vs. Florida State; South Carolina vs. North Carolina
Week 2 - Alabama vs. Texas; Ole Miss vs. Tulane; Mississippi State vs. Arizona; Texas A&M vs. Miami