Wow ... really? That's awful! However, in my humble opinion ... and I fully realize this is far easier for me to say than for you to live, but ... for your well-being and that of your family, I believe we are all better served if we can find a way to leave hate behind and allow retribution to be served by the justice system to those perpetrators who can be arrested and served by God to those perpetrators who are able to evade our human justice system. Hate is not healthy, no matter how well you think you can handle it ... it has a nasty habit of being nurtured into an indiscriminately destructive cancer the longer it is held onto.
The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted. ~ D.H. Lawrence